Melds and Mends
by Sexy.Lil.Emo
Summary: After Spock knocks out Khan and takes him back to the ship to save Kirk, he reflects upon the meld that took place in the radiation chamber as Jim died. He discovers some things that have the potential to change his and Jim's relationship for good, but what will happen when Jim wakes up? - Spirk


Hey guys, I was coming home on the plane from my holiday and wrote this little fic, it is set in STID just after Spock knocks Khan out on Earth so they can use his blood to save Kirk. Hope you enjoy it, much love xox

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Green blood was drying on his knuckles as he sat next to his friend (and possibly more). His head bowed and hands clasped together under his chin.

McCoy had told him to leave the medbay labs while he tried to use Khan's blood to save the captain's life. Kirk was still in the cryo tube for now, until McCoy could perfect the serum. McCoy had been getting irritated by Spock's hovering, they were both trying to push their emotions aside to work efficiently and effectively to save the captain.

So, Spock sat there next to Jim analysing the recent events in his mind. The great sadness and loss he had felt when Jim's heart stopped beating. The uncontrollable rage and desire to kill Khan no matter what happened to himself. The little spark of hope when Nyota had told him they may be able to save Kirk using Khan's blood.

The thing he went over the most was the knowledge, recognition and true emotions he felt while melding with Jim in those final moments. Spock not only realised his own buried feelings for the Captain, but also the feelings Jim had for him. That was not all he had discovered though.

Although Spock had never felt it before, the Vulcan was sure that James T Kirk was T'hy'la and that was something that scared and excited him in many ways.

After hours of analysation and waiting by his captain, two nurses came in and began hurriedly preparing the cryo tube for transport off the Enterprise to an Earth hospital.

Spock stood immediately as they came in "What is happening?"

"We are moving the Captain to Earth for Doctor McCoy to administer the serum. The Doctor has requested your presence for this." One of the nurses replied before wheeling Kirk out.

Spock followed briskly, not letting Jim out of his sight. McCoy met him in the corridor as they were walking. They nodded to each other but didn't speak, Spock observed how strained and exhausted McCoy looked, he didn't comment, knowing he didn't look much better.

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Spock had been sitting by Jim's bed for days, watching over him, except for bathroom breaks, making statements and talking to starfleet. He refused to sleep, choosing to meditate instead and hardly ate, going to the limits he knew his body could handle.

McCoy entered the room to check on Kirk and immediately glanced at Spock, knowing the Vulcan would be there "When was the last time you ate?"

"Doctor, I do not need-"

"Spock, as a Doctor I am ordering you to go and eat something." McCoy ordered, as he went over to Jim and began to look over his vitals. Jim was fully recovered thanks to Khan's blood, but he still hadn't woken up yet. Bones knew he should very soon, but he didn't share that with Spock just in case he was wrong.

Spock got up and left silently, and Bones sighed as the door clicked shut behind him. He grasped Jim's arm lightly, feeling his pulse and comforting himself at the same time.

Spock had not been the same since Jim had died, he sat vigil by the bed day and night. Even when their crew members came to visit he refused to leave. Uhura could see the effect it was having on the Vulcan and tried to comfort him, and persuade him to get some rest. Spock not only refused her but they ended up fighting. Bones had come in to see what the shouting was about and arrived in time to hear Spock end their relationship.

When asked, Spock only said he wished not to talk about it and then inquired about the Captain.

Bones had recounted all this to Jim while he slept, as you would talk to a coma patient, not knowing if Jim could hear him or not, but needing his best friend to talk to none the less.

Suddenly, the arm under his hand moved, stirring him from his thoughts.

"Ughnnn...Bones?" Croaked a hoarse voice.

The doctor looked up to see a pair of bright blue eyes staring at him.

"About damn time," He said "you've been out for two weeks."

"It's good to see you too Bones, but how am I alive?" Jim asked, trying to get more comfortable after being in the same position for two weeks.

"Remember how I injected Khan's blood into that dead tribble?" Kirk motioned that he remembered "Well, same deal." Jim's eyes widened a little "Not feeling homicidal?"

Jim huffed a laugh "No more than usual."

"Jim!"

Kirk looked past Bones to see his first officer standing in the doorway "Hey, Spock." He smiled.

Spock strode into the room, set his drink down on the small guest table and went straight up to his captain "I believe I speak for everyone when I say; do not ever do that again."

"Spock, that's enough." McCoy warned.

But Jim had seen that look on Spock's face only twice before, and it was not anger, but sadness, loss and fear.

"I will try." He promised and the Vulcan nodded.

There was a silence between them and Jim knew he and Spock had more things to discuss, such as their meld before his death.

McCoy had already begun running tests on Kirk. Meanwhile, the captain and his first officer just continued to look at each other, questions and uncertainty in their eyes. Soon McCoy noticed and excused himself to go do some 'doctor things'.

Neither of them knew what to say once they were alone.

"I-"

"Spock, I-"

"You first, captain."

Jim didn't bother to argue, he just went straight on "I...I wanted to say I'm sorry for putting my feelings on you in the last moment, I didn't want to die without you knowing how I felt, what you mean to me. I realise though, now I have been revived that it wasn't my best move. I know you are with Uhura and I don't want to get in the way, and I will understand if you wish to transfer-"

"Nyota and I are no longer in a romantic relationship. Also I have no desire to transfer, my place is on the Enterprise with you." The Vulcan corrected him.

Jim was confused, it seemed things had changed while he was out "I don't understand, Spock." He sat up slowly to face his first officer better.

"May I meld with you?" Spock asked suddenly, it would be easier for him to show Jim than try to explain something he had never felt before.

"Of course." Kirk replied curious as to why he wished to mind meld in the middle of their conversation.

Spock touched his fingers to the correct points of Jim's face and whispered the words relevant to the meld.

Their minds opened to each other and Spock let the emotions he felt for Jim rise to the surface "You are an extraordinary being Jim, and upon melding with you, to see how you feel, I recognised those feelings within myself. I had not realised sooner as I have never felt anything like this before. It was as if things had been made a lot clearer and I could understand my own emotions more."

Jim wasn't sure whether Spock was speaking out loud or in his mind, but he heard it and felt it. Spock had just exposed his deepest feelings to Jim and he knew what that meant to a Vulcan.

The hand pulled away from Jim's face, as did Spock's mind from his. It didn't make any sense to him, but it felt as though he had lost half of himself when he was alone in his mind once more.

"Spock, I-you..." He looked into brown eyes, eyes that waited to be rejected and crushed. Jim's heart broke from the look in those eyes. He caressed Spock's cheek softly, and when the Vulcan didn't shy away from the touch, Jim leant in and kissed him. It felt so right, like his whole life he had been waiting for that kiss and then Spock kissed back and it was perfect.

Kirk had been kissed many times by multiple people, but never like this, not even by people he had dated. He knew that this was it for him, his heart belonged to Spock and somehow it didn't scare him.

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As an extra note, if I feel like it in the future, I may write other scenes from other gaps in the AOS movies, or add another chapter to this, or I may leave it alone completely, not sure yet, but if you're interested let me know, or keep an eye out :)


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